Friday, December 9, 2011

Winner, Winner Chicken Dinner!

(whhhhhyyyyyyy do I have these ridiculous phrases trapped in my head? The other day it was W00T! and I'm not even sure I understand that one. What's with the zeros??)

Hello, and happy Friday to you! Oh goodness, I am right on the cusp of my 11-month post-op day (Sunday)...I will need to arrange to have kiddos take pictures this weekend. We have a busy agenda of doing gingerbread houses tomorrow and a kid's birthday party on Sunday. Maybe sneak in some pictures with Santa. So much to do! I have not bought one single Christmas present, so I need to get on the move there, too.

Okay - last night's first date goes down firmly in the win category! I'll try not to blather but I did tell a friend this morning that it was validation for getting divorced and getting to date and find someone who is a good match next time around. Other dates have been good, I've met some nice men, etc. but there's always been things where you think, 'eh, we're different in that regard, but that's workable,' etc. You know my stance on men who do not drink, haha. (inserting the now-standard blog disclaimer that I Am Not A Lush [IANAL]*, maybe I'll just make that part of the blog's acronyms so I don't have to keep saying it and you don't have to keep thinking, "sure, sure, you're not," while you mark a little tally in the "she's talking about alcohol again" column.)

*Needs better acronym

Anyway - this is funny, because I'm actually finding myself a bit hesitant to say much about the date here because I can actually envision copping to this blog's existence to him one day! He purports to love my writing and uhhh, here's gobs and gobs of it. Catching up from the beginning? That'll give you a good dose of get-it-out-of-your-system!

So, I will strike a balance between wanting to give you scoop, and wanting to pass the red-face test of "hey, I read your entry about our first" Okay...we met at a nice bar near my house, pretty shortly after both of us got off work. I was completely nervous, I am not a skilled dater (a coworker met her husband online and she basically made a business out of it, going on 4-5 dates per week until she ultimately met the man she would marry. Then they had a baby within a year, very much according to schedule, I'm guessing. There's some adherence to a life plan! Wooboy. Not my strategy.) and there are still some mental misalignment issues of fat-Julie and hawt-Julie that can mess with my self-confidence at times like these.

Digressing. I got there just a minute before he did so I didn't have time to a) guzzle down a glass of wine to calm my nerves (IANAL) or b) sit around and get nervous I'd be stood up. I needn't have been nervous - we clicked (Kim, that is not an online dating term, that is just a social interaction term) immediately. Ah, I was still nervous, but you know, it was good. We actually hung out there for four hours just talking and getting to know each other and having fun. Afterward, he walked me to my car, remembered my kid-schedule and asked me out for my next free night. Gave me a nice kiss and away we go! He emailed this morning that he'd had a great time and was looking forward to seeing me again. Brought up a suggestion for a third date next weekend to see if I'd be interested.

Tie that sucker up with a festive bow, that was a great first date!

Few things:

  • For no particular reason, I have not disclosed my weight loss surgery status. Sabrina asked me about that this morning and I was a little befuddled. Yes, we've emailed a bunch and talked a bunch, but it just has not come up. The internal Dr. Freud in me wonders if I have not wanted it to come up? It's the sort of thing I talk freely about with friends and family and many coworkers and the World Wide Web, but nope, I haven't brought it up. I'm not ashamed of WLS or anything...maybe just not wanting to paint a picture of my former self before my current self is established in one's mind. 
  • I had the opportunity, last night, I suppose, as I suggested we split a burger and then of my portion, you know I only ate a few bites then turned it over to him...really, this would have been a great time and I did think of saying something but we were busily chatting about something else. I did not feel like saying "Pardon me, I would like to interrupt this interesting conversation to say that I have a teeny tummy."
  • This is really just a general dating observation and even more so a commentary about myself, but prior to the date I was full of little mini-reservations...he's so nice in his emails, what if he's a puss pushover? (He's not, haha. I saw signs of that same sorta-crass humor and he's very much at my energy/spirit level.) BOY - can you see my divorce scars? My ex was a real mild-tempered fellow and I have to say, I walked all over that... Haha, I thought I had a list of reservations that I could address here, but really, I think that was the one I feared most. You are articulate and funny and smart and I have been enjoying the hell out of talking to you...please God, don't be TOO NICE or I will be so incredibly disappointed. I am ridiculous, I see this now. :) But at the same time, I am me, and that's how I roll. No milquetoasts allowed at my party.

Okay, so there's the restrained version of the date recap. I really did have fun and am looking forward to seeing him again. Also, the potential there leaves me with clear conscience in doing what I told my Sugar Daddy yesterday I was going to do, whether last night's date was win, lose or draw. I'm taking the online profile down until after the holidays. This dating stuff is mentally exhausting!


  1. Oh by the way did I ever mention to you that I used to weigh 100+ lbs more than I do now? Aaaack! NOPE! NOT YET! Totally a convo for a completely different day. Yes, establish the current image of you in his mind before dragging him back to if he had met you a year ago. I'm so happy that you CLICKED...ha ha ha...not an internet term. You deserve to have some good times and enjoy dating...sounds like he may stick around a while if you are already planning a 3rd date right after the 1st one. Woot. (sorry I had to do it!)

  2. He knows about your THREE children and your REAL age, right? I kind of think those two things would be more putoffish (it's a word, ha) than succeeding at your weight loss. I mean this in the nicest way...

    I can just feel the excitement in your post. I'm so looking forward to our, I mean your, next few dates!

  3. Hahaha, Sheila, yes, I had already thought the same thing, because I have to say, I am looking for reasons not to like someone, esp someone I meet online. So them planting the image of being 106 pounds heavier in my mind on the first date is NOT SEXY!!

    KIM!! You beeyatch!! Yes, he knows my real age and yes, he knows about my THREE CHILDREN! BAHAHAHA I died when I read your comment.

    And FTR, he has emailed me and said he doesn't want to seem pushy, but knows my kid-free time is limited and wants to know if he can see me next weekend, too. So phhhbbbllltttt on you. ;)

  4. (Kim would never date me, she throws those three kids up in my face regularly as an explanation of while I'll die loveless and alone, with my eyeballs eaten by my many cats. I think she thinks I can return them to Costco or sumpin', haha)

  5. In defense of my comment, I think a guy that is fine with you having numerous offspring is not going to blink an eye at the way you looked a year ago. If he's smart, he's only going to be concerned about the future, not the past. I feel so misunderstood:)

    And, I would date you. At the winery, hopefully sometime this spring. I don't want to bring my children or yours, so I guess there are some boundary issues I have.