Monday, November 18, 2013

Accountability - Putting it out there

Ack! Things are falling apart here, and I am facing my own demons, realizing the path I am on is a familiar one when it comes to stress, laziness, boredom, and the onset of winter. :)

Thank you, Sheila at This One Body for checking in on me. I have probably a half dozen "draft" blog entries written that I never finished and thus, never posted. I should just start writing shorter blog entries, haha.

Let's see. I have been gaining a lot of weight. Who would have thought this would be possible for me to allow myself to do this, after going through weight loss surgery and very expensive tummy tuck plastic surgery? I am very disappointed in myself.

Excuses:
- G is a phenomenal cook who has been home from work for awhile, following knee surgery. Every dinner is on par with Thanksgiving dinner, it seems like.
- Have I ever, ever, ever told you how much I hate winter? Cold and wet are insufferable to me. And lady, we're just getting started!
- X and I have been battling a fair amount over joint custody issues. We're not really *battling,* I suppose, but we are both struggling and it is really hard and stressful. This is the first time in the four years since we split that I have consulted an attorney.
- I am lazy. I need to find a winter pasttime, because I do not want to do anything outside (unless it is sunny and I am guaranteed not to get cold).
- I realize, and accept, that for me to be really engaged in activity, I need a "spark plug." When I was with Mr. W, I would have toughed out bike riding in the crummy weather. I have always been sure that if I had a local running buddy, I would get more running done.
- I have all but given up on pushing my daughter to work out. She is busy with her first year in high school, her first regular babysitting gig, her debate club practices, volunteering, etc. And, like me, she doesn't prioritize exercise all that high. She needs a spark plug, too, but I am not that spark plug.

Meh. It will all work out. I am trying to work up the courage to do like one of my other favorite blogs, Runs for Cookies, and post a weekly weigh-in photo. It appears to be the only way I'll get myself on that friggin' scale. I haven't been on it in probably three weeks, and now I am too skeered. My clothes are all so damn tight, too. Bah.

Whine, whine, whine. I am struggling right now, that's not unusual for me this time of year. I will figure it out. :)

On a positive note, a woman in my office is having WLS (bypass) from my surgeon right before Christmas. I like to think that my success has been a big motivator for her, and I am feeling a certain sense of "responsibility" to be a good WLS veteran by working through my struggles.

5 comments:

  1. Yo Julie. You need to take a road trip and come up here so we can run together. :)

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  2. Well hello there lovely! I've so been right where you are (the gaining not the plastics) and IT IS a TOUGH spot to be in. So I'm sending you a giant hug and I know how much this time of year sucks to switch the mental flip, because I know all about your SAD and how you would rather just stay under the covers. But I also know you can do this and you didn't come THIS FAR to check out. We are here for ya anytime...

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  3. The weather has been seriously sucky lately, Ugh! Do you have equipment at home you can work out with? Might have to just do that while the weather is bad just to get some movement in.

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  4. JULIE!!!! You can take control! I should post scale photos as well, but it sad I don't want to. How long can I say I just had a baby. If you do I will starting Friday we can try to hold each other accountable.

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