99 and Counting

Yeah baby! I feel a "100 pounds lost" post coming in the very near future! Or relatively near future. Yesterday I was down 99, today I bounced up a couple pounds. Ebb and flow, give and take, like the tides. Your time will come, mama! Soon, soon, soon.

I have to tell you, I bought some DAMN SEXY BOOTS yesterday! I'll have to post a picture later - not too much later, because I have my tennies to change into when my feet finally rebel in complete and utter pain, haha. Clothes shopping is becoming fun again! Now I just need a never-ending supply of cash to finance my shopping desires. I bought the boots and a pair of leggings at DSW, then took my daughter over to Lane Bryant so she and I could bra-shop. I had ulterior motives: busty me still is best served by shopping for bras at LB (36DDD) and I knew they'd have a bra that fit her, too (38C). I'm pretty packed into the DDD, but it's a nice fit and they have bras with good support. The ulterior motive was that it was "buy 2, get 1 free," so I got her two bras to my one.

While at Lane Bryant, I tried on my new leggings and boots, but needed to see a longer top that covered my bootie - I felt so naked in the leggings! The salesgirl found me a t-shirt dress that was very cute. The smallest size at LB is a 14, and ladies, I am proud to say (again) that I simply cannot shop at LB anymore. :) Here I was just 9+ months ago afraid that soon I wouldn't be able to find my size at LB at the OTHER END OF THE SPECTRUM.

But the cute t-shirt dress over the leggings had me doing the booty dance in the dressing room, I was so happy about how much my body has changed.

My dear friend and major source of motivation and inspiration, Sheila at This One Body, hit her one-year anniversary from surgery the other day. And something she said really resonated with me (well, most everything she says really resonates with me):

So, where am I at today? To me the sleeve is such a gift. I never in my LIFE would have been satisfied with eating such small portions. To try and diet like this without the reinforcement of a surgically-induced smaller stomach would just be pure torture. The no hunger thing is just priceless, so easy to make good eating decisions when your world is not ruled by constant hunger.

Amen, sister! I had success in the past dieting, but what I never lost was my appetite for big portions. And that's what killed me. It wasn't junk food, or sugary sodas, or fried foods, it was food, and too much of it. That is what has changed the most about my post-sleeve life. And amazingly, you don't even think about how small your portions are now! You just eat for satisfaction, and these days, it doesn't take much to satisfy.

It would be disingenuous to blog this morning without blogging about some other things that are on my mind. The primary thing that dragged me out of bed yesterday and off for some much-needed retail therapy is that I have been down in the dumps. This is a hard time of year for me, anyway - the change in seasons must wreak havoc with my brain chemistry and such. I don't wanna go to work, I don't wanna see my friends, I don't wanna do nuttin' but hang out in my bed and feel sorry for myself. This is not a good long-term plan, haha.

I confess, I make a terrible single person. I really need someone to play off of - I am all fun and energy and good times and such - unless I'm alone. Bah. I think I'm just overly socialized. But I'm a strange combination of it, because I am definitely NOT the life-of-the-party type. Big group things stress me out. Thus, you can see my dilemma in hanging out with my little cluster of friends, none of which are interested in the others. There are a TON of meetup.com singles activities in my area - I really need to get comfortable with getting out there, because online dating makes me feel like slitting my own throat. And in my job, I have very little contact with the outside world, so I'm not meeting anyone there. I have actually thought about getting a second job where I could enjoy chatting with people...but, ugh, second job?? I was thinking bookstore, Williams-Sonoma (where I would not meet men, but instead only women like myself who overspend on kitchen gadgets they will never use)...ah, who knows?

My back-up plan is to somehow force myself into becoming a fitness freak. This would burn up hours during the fall and winter that I would otherwise spending laying in bed watching TV. The results would be measurable and fairly quickly realized. A buffed-out body would help me make decisions in the next year or so about plastic surgery.

It's just the getting myself on board part that is so hard, especially when all I can think are the two tracks running through my head:

- Damn, these boots are sexy! and
- When can I go home? I want my blankie!

Have a great day, all! I'll try to swing back and post a sexy boot pic in a bit. Got to wait for Sabrina to get in the office.