Lost Yer Food Privileges, Did Ya?

Today's Weight: 184.6 pounds

Today's Eating:
- 1 Earl Gray tea with 3 oz whole milk (55 cal/3 g protein)
- 3 Earl Gray teas with 3 oz skim milk  (93 cal/9 g protein)
- 2 super-yummy-gawd-I've-missed-these Premier Protein Chocolate shakes (320 cal/60 g protein)

Today's Exercise
- 60 flights stairs, 23.5 minutes
- 1 mile walking to bus
- JOGGED .25 MILES!
- Walked track 1 mile

Woe is me and my carb-hungry little tummy. I am on-track for a zero-loss month in my 7th month post-op, and I am not happy about it! Although it is my time of the month, I am a bloated and overfed suckling pig. I can tell you that there is no way on earth that Monkey Munch/Puppy Chow/Muddy Buddies and I can exist in harmony. Refer to my post earlier this year, I Know What Evil Looks Like. So it was perhaps not the best decision to make a giant batch of it to bring to my friend's house this weekend. (Although, with six kids 14 and under between us, it also seemed like a very good decision to bring it.)

Anyway, it was a long, carb-filled weekend spent munching Monkey Munch, which I didn't even know existed until Kim's daughter made me some, and then eating a Drumstick on the long drive home from the Vancouver/Portland area. And it occurred to me: stalls and slow-downs are par for the course with WLS, but with my current eating and lack of physical activity...well, I don't get to blame it all on stalls or slow-downs, do I?

Is this it? Am I happy with my weight loss? Am I prepared to throw in the towel and call this good?

No.

I *want* to get to goal. I want to weigh in my 120s. Hell, I want to weigh less than 150. I am not done. Ipso facto, it's time to hit the reset button on this weight loss game. I have put myself into maintenance mode this month: not eating terribly much, but eating as I would expect to eat when I have gotten to goal. Gone are 2.6 ounce packages of vacuum-packed tuna, a hard-boiled egg for breakfast, et al. Welcome have been half and half in my tea, 3/4 of a taco from Taco Time as a recurring meal, etc. Maintenance eating.

(Monkey munch - cherry vodka cocktails - Drumstick ice cream cones...these are the aggregious food violations of late.)

Anyway, I stopped at Costco and bought protein shakes last night. I'm cleansing my carb-hungry palate. Reminding myself exactly how tiny the tiny tummy is. Forcing myself into a higher protein intake. Try as I might, I just do not believe that I get 70+ grams of protein in a day with my normal eating. That is quite difficult to accomplish without supplements, I'll have you know!

The plan: repeat the two-week protein shake diet. I will be flexible: my goal here is not to starve or punish. It's to remind myself how much of my eating is boredom/emotional/mindless. I have 15% of my former stomach - I simply do not get hungry very often. But my eating has been creeping back to my pre-op days, and I will not stand for it.

Will I make it? I have to say yes, because if I start giving myself outs now, I'll come up with all sorts of ways to excuse myself from the goal. We'll see how it goes, but yes, that is the plan. I have survived it before, I will survive it again.