Jail Bird!!

I got a phone call out of the blue yesterday from a woman who said she was calling from "Seattle's Most Wanted." I had been identified as a person of interest...oh dear, my little pulse was racing at this point as I'm thinking, "WHAT DID I DO??"

This is a problem when you have a guilty conscience. :) Turns out I hadn't done anything (Whew!) but someone (I need to find out who did this to me) nominated me for the 2013 Muscular Dystrophy Association Seattle Lock Up. You've probably seen it before: a coworker or someone you know gets publicly hauled off and paraded through the building and taken to jail, being tasked to raise bail to get sprung.

Well, a little inside information, I am being arrested on July 31st and it doesn't sound too hellish:

- Yummy Seattle firefighters will come to my office and demand that I go with them (this would never take too much persuading for me to blindly follow a firefighter in uniform). I might bring my own handcuffs just in case they forget theirs. :)

- I will be taken to the Columbia Tower Club on the 76th floor of the Columbia Center (all the way across the street from my office) where I will be force fed prison gruel:

Oh, how I will suffer.

The only way they could possibly make it worse for me is if they make me drink the lemon vodka slush that Kim found on Pinterest the other day:

Please, no, not the Lemon Vodka Slush, anything but that!

Hmm, I have already digressed from the true intent of this Lock Up and the Muscular Dystrophy Association. Something about vodka and firefighters and mile high clubs...oh my!

Oy, maybe they picked the wrong ambassador. :)

Please consider helping me raise bail money. I have been asked to raise $3200 bail for the MDA, who does tons of great work in Seattle and around the country for children and adults with neuromuscular diseases. Specifically, the MDA appealed to me to help raise funds to send three kids to MDA Summer Camp so they can hang with other kids with the same challenges. The idea of a specialized summer camp appealed to me because I had a coworker whose son had been badly burned as a toddler. Every year, he went to "Burn Camp" with other kids who had been burned, and he looked forward to it all year long as a chance to be with kids and counselors who understood. I expect MDA camp is a lot like that, too.

They're hauling my ass off to jail on 7/31, so I've got a couple months to raise bail. If you can help, I'd appreciate it! I won't be the first time I've seen the inside of a jail house, maybe, but I expect it will be the nicest! :)

Click here to visit my personal MDA website to help me post bail.

Don't let me rot: I've got a long way to go to make bail!

New Triathlete on the Block

I know I yapped about it on facebook, but did I ever tell you I won an entry to my very first triathlon?? Yep, Becky over at Run Fun Done had a giveaway to the Dilletante Women's Triathlon and I was the lucky winner! It was especially lucky given that I am familiar with this lake and the area of the event. I used to swim here as a kid, and in later years, took my own kids to this park. I haven't been there in years since we moved away, but it's in my comfort zone, anyway.

HOW NERVOUS AM I?? I gotta tell ya - I'm not prepared. Sure, I'm prepared for the biking. But I haven't been running or swimming. This is going to be purely for sport entertainment. Competing Completing a triathlon was on my goal list for 2013, but I languished about committing. The crummy weather, the slow recovery from my tummy tuck, the ups and downs and ups of my romantic life - well, I haven't been pursuing athleticism very aggressively this year.

But I am very excited, and confident I can get through this event. I'll be flying by the seat of my pants on the swimming portion, but I am a strong swimmer and I'm not afraid of the open water (although I do dread the possibility of being kicked in the face by other swimmers, ugh). I'll get it done!!

In other news, my daughter Alli and I are going to do the Seattle Biggest Loser Run/Walk in October. And get this - she wants to do the half marathon! She's very excited about it. I think the fact that it is a Biggest Loser event, combined with being a "run/walk," she doesn't feel pressure to go for it. We'll be doing a lot of walking, I'm sure, but I'm going to pull together a training program for us and get going on it. This will be a wonderful event for us to look forward to doing together!

Now on to things that are really on my mind these days. :) I am having such fun with Greg. I am happy and relaxed and enjoying myself and in love. It is a good, good feeling. We are having a lot of good times and making lots of plans for the future. He and the kids are doing great together.

We're staying in town this weekend because he's working lots of overtime on a big road project. We've got a couple weekend getaways planned in the near future, though.

More later. :)

Two Pictures Say Two Thousand Words

My plastic surgeon just emailed me his official before and after photos...

Leaning forward, ugh. This was always the worst for me.

And don't I have pretty panties? Skinny girls get to wear thongs. ;) Something I would have never, ever considered in the old days.

Also, in these pics you can really see the widening of the scar that I'm having touched up next week. He'll just numb it and excise the wide part and stitch me back up. Says it's no big deal.

Tell Me What You (Don't) Like About Yourself

Every time I think about my first plastic surgery consult, I think of the show "Nip/Tuck" and their tagline, "Tell me what you don't like about yourself." Sheila over at This One Body got me thinking about it this week, for two reasons: one, I had promised a six-month post-tummy tuck update with pictures here; and two, she has just recently gone for her own consult. Go read!

Before my tummy tuck on 11/11/12, I had two plastic surgery consults. The first one left me in tears. It was so awful. The doctor was seemingly kind, but I left there feeling like a POS (piece o' isht) about myself and my body; much, much worse than I had before the appointment. He tried to sell me a $20K facelift: pointing out my droopy corners of my mouth, my jowly cheeks, my turkey wattle. Things I knew about already, but didn't feel all that terribly about. I did by the time I left the office. He didn't do lower body lifts, but made me feel terrible about how extensive of a tummy tuck I would need.

It was an emotionally devastating appointment. Untold thousands of dollars in proposed work. Money I would *never* be able to spend. Hell, money I'll never *have*!

Sometime later, I saw my weight loss surgeon for a follow-up appointment. He urged me to go see his friend, another plastic surgeon. I declined. I had had enough of the emotional beat down! But I really wanted that tummy tuck: all that floppy skin was resulting in mind-ufckery related to knowing I was at my goal weight, but *seeing* all that excess weight every time I looked in the mirror.

I can't tell you how glad I am I went for that second consult. My doctor, the one who ultimately did the surgery, was so sweet. He made me feel GOOD about my body. He didn't try to upsell me. In fact, he talked me out of a couple things I had been mulling (arm/thigh lift, etc). He was very kind about my body, and he was very congratulatory about all my hard work to get there.

I was so thrilled to book the surgery with him, and so excited about the upcoming results. The doctor made all the difference! By the way,  I found the first doctor by googling "Best plastic surgeon Bellevue Washington." He is very talented and very expensive. He was warm and friendly. He was seemingly "helpful." He really broke my heart. "Best" does not mean the same thing to everyone, haha.

Well - the rest is history. I had that tummy tuck (which cost about $9K) last November, six+ months ago now. And I give you...my semi-nekky body:

Before. Ha! Wouldn't that suck if it was the "after"?

Six-ish months post-op.
Testosterone is taking over  my house, as you can see in the background. And foreground, haha.

Side view.

Ah, I love the results! The scars aren't great, but they aren't terrible. As you see, I had the fleur de lis cut, grabbing all that loose skin and tightening it around my torso, too. I am glad I had that done, scars and all. Do you see that thickening of the scar just below my bra-line? The skin pulled a little too tight and the scar got thicker. I'm having that redone (no charge) in early June, just a quick in-office procedure.

I'm about 10 pounds heavier than the day I had my surgery. I feel it in my boobs, upper arms and my thighs. OH, MY THIGHS! So much more muscle-y from all the biking, but jeans that always fit well are snug on my thighs now. I am displeased, but not traumatized. I accept that I may well never finish my goal list on the right hand margin of this blog. I guess my body is just not ever going to be waif-like. :)

The doctor says the redness will be gone from my scars in six months to a year. I have a couple other significant scars (spinal fusion and broken ankle) and both of them are colorless. I'm not terribly worried about it - the scars bother me far less than the loose skin!

In short, I am so glad I had that surgery, even though I will be paying on it for a long time. I would love to have a breast lift and ugh, maybe augmentation (see, with all the weight loss, I guess to get a fuller look, you really need implants). My plastic surgeon said he would do the breasts in two procedures: lift/reduction followed by implants after I heal. I told him after the lift/augmentation, I may well decide not to go farther. I get squee'd out about things inside me...I really have never wanted implants and all the resultant maintenance and worry. We'll see. It's far, far down the road, if it happens at all. The tummy tuck was a giant financial splurge for this mama.

Happy, Happy

The sun has been out in Seattle, well, mostly - yesterday it stayed super foggy until nearly 4 p.m., then turned GLORIOUSLY sunny. And when the sun is out, so am I! I learned many years ago that I need to take advantage of that sunshine when we get it, or I am one giant crankypants. I'm happy to say I've been making the most of it:

- I rode my bike to and/or from work four days this week. Looks like I should log over 77 commuter miles this week, if I don't wimp out and ask Greg to pick me up after work. See, my private parties are really sore from wearing what was probably the most inappropriate undergarment on my ride home yesterday: a thong. Halfway home on the commute, I almost stopped and took off my panties, it was that bad. :)

(TMI, you say? Well, to that, I say, "Hello, and welcome, brand new first time blog reader! TMI is my specialty!")

Well, I thought I was fine for the ride this morning, and I even put on my padded bike shorts to be sure. I was NOT FINE. It was another gorgeous, glorious morning, and I spent most of my ride thinking about my nether regions.

Except when I passed the "Bike to Work Month" special table of cute boys handing out free cookies and water bottles! Then I thought, "Hey, what's on that table, what are they doing?" but I was going by pretty fast and I was already running late, and by the time I saw COOKIES I was already heading down the hill and didn't want to turn back. But I thought about cookies for most of the rest of the way. And free water bottles, but I didn't have any way to carry it anyway, since my own filled bottle was occupying my bottle holder.

So. I'm not sure if I'll call for a ride home or not. We'll see...it would be another beautiful ride, though. I do have the option of leaving my bike here over night, and that would allow me to bring home my book (Gone Girl) that I am dying to finish this weekend. However, I ordered a bike rack and back from amazon, specifically so I can carry things like, OHHHH, my book and a lunch when I ride to work. That will be here today or tomorrow, and if I ride home, I'll be able to put it on over the weekend. Decisions, decisions. It is pretty irritating to not be able to carry hardly anything on my bike, I must say. I don't even have a reasonable backpack to use! The one time I tried riding with a backpack, it was a freaking headache. To ride a lot, or a longish distance, I think you need a very small pack that is made for cyclists. Mine swung all over as I pedaled, plus on the hills it was just a HASSLE.

Whew, I gather you understand how dramatic this bike storage rack issue is for me by now, yes? I'll drop it, then. :)

The title of this post is "Happy, Happy," because, well, I am. I love sunny weather (I should move, I should move) and I am in love, and my children are mostly sweet and wonderful. Greg and I are doing awesomely and if I haven't said it here before, I'll say it now, this is the relationship I wanted with him the first time around and felt sure we could have. I am having a wonderful time.

More later. :) Have a wonderful weekend!